Holy Shit he got a job.

Since I don't want to palgerize I should give credit where credit is due, the title is actually a quote from my dad. And if you paid attention to your Iowa testing as a kid, you'd be able to infer that yes, I am now officially employed. :) Well, minus the pay cause I don't technically start until July. Another month of being poor, yes. But I am use to being poor by this point, so its no big deal. Maybe I could write a book like that McCourt fellow, Carp's Tassles, about stripping for money and selling my pride. Sorry? The book wasn't called Angela's Ass's? Ashes... why would he name it..? Oh. So that's not what he wrote about? they moved where? and died of what? I see... So maybe I'm not actually poor, but I still think I could write a damn good book about stripping. Ofcourse, like any good author I'd need to do research... ladies I'll post a sign up sheet shortly. Things to ponder... so yes, I got a job with a sweet company and I ship out to Seattle at the beggining of July, for some wicked training.

I had an awesome time hanging out with the rachems and ms crow for the MavericksVSpurs series. It was a nail biter, as it would seem most maverick games are but we pulled it out in the end. Lo siento jenn. For sports games, McKinney Avenue Tavern is the schwizzle. The crowd was by far the most involved and fun yet for a game night. Last night's game against the suns was awesome! Our turnoverization of the Suns totally turned it around in the second half. I spent most of the spurs series, and even the early sun games wishing we could shoot threes. But I've come to accept my red-headed step childen as the pick&go short shotters they are, it works for them so it works for me.

I may have mentioned this before, but I love the Slip Inn. The music is hot, the bartenders fun, the booths are sweet, but it really comes down to something less tangible. An essence that is the byproduct of something quite tangible, the rules:





I think that says it all.

So, before we get to the finale I thought I'd lay some Matisyahu wisdom. If you haven't yet, check out his Live at Stubb's album.

Strip away the layers and reveal your soul
Got to give yourself up and then you become whole
You're a slave to yourself and you don't even know
You want to live the fast life but your brain moves slow
If you're trying to stay high then you're bound to stay low
You want God but you can't deflate your ego

The Wedding...

Congratulations are in order for Mr.&Mrs. Rashidi.


I've been to my fair share of weddings, always the bridesmaid never the bride, (thank god... on so many levels) and I can honestly say that Paul & Melissa are really great together. I couldn't be more happy for them. Their wedding was awesome! First it was at St. Elzabeth Ann Seton Catholic Church. This church is incredible: stone, arched cielings with paintings, murals on the walls, stained glass everywhere, etc. A very nice backdrop for a wonderful wedding. The reception was held at the Mariott near by and I have to say that was one of the coolest receptions I've ever been to. Instead of just having a DJ or a wedding band, they had a MC who 'ran' the reception. The way the events flowed together, the energy in the room, etc was all sweet and is a very cool idea for a wedding.

So... pictures:
The arrival...


Ofcourse, it wouldn't be a blog post de la Carp if it didn't have: sexy ladies.


Group hug!


Last dance... Last dance.... for loooooooove:


Since the invention of the kiss there have been five kisses....



ahhh, *tear*
me.

p.s. I copyright the term Angela's Ass's and its use for any and all pornographic works. I'm rich beeyatch.

the heart of life is good.

So courtesy of ElBlacko, I acquired a 'stealth performance' by John Mayer (where the billing was done under a different name and then posted last minute) to preview some of his material for his upcoming album Continuum. For some reason a lot of people write him off, mostly because they never even listened to much of his music. Clearly not being one of those people I kind of sat on the album before posting (or that 'talking about' thing you HUUMAWNS do with each other) because to me his music is frequently raw life, pulling directly from love, angst, fear, hope, etc, albeit with killer word choice, transcribed in song. Before really finding my ideas about the new songs I had to live a bit with them. Now that I have, to me this is some of his best yet. See lines below, full lyrics here.

Trust Myself

hold on to whatever you find baby
hold on to whatever will get you through
hold on to whatever you find baby
i dont trust myself with lovin you

I will beg myself into your garden
then I'll break my way out when it rains
just to get back to the place where i started
so i can want you back all over again

Waiting on the World to Change

now if we had the power
to bring our neighbors home from war
they would have never missed a Christmas
no more ribbons on their door
and when you trust your television
what you get is what you got
cause when they own the information, oh
they can bend it all they want

Slow Dancing in a Burning Room

It's not a silly little moment
It's not the storm before the calm
This is the deep and dyin breath of
this love we've been workin on
Can't seem to hold you like I want to
so I can feel you in my arms
Nobody's gonna come and save you
we pulled to many false alarms

We're goin down
and you can see it too
We're goin down
and you know that we're doomed
my dear
we're slow dancing in a burnin room

Dreaming with a Broken Heart

When you're dreamin with a broken heart
The wakin is the hardest part
you roll outta bed and down on your knees
and for a moment you can hardly breath

wonderin was she really here
is she standin in my room
no she's not, cuz she's
gone gone gone gone gone

Stop this Train

Don't know how else to say it
dont wanna see my parents go
one generations length away from
findin life out on my own

Come on Stop this train
I wanna get off and go home
again
cant take the speed
it's movin in
I know i cant
but honestly wont someone
stop this train

In Repair

Too many shadows in my room
too many hours in this midnight
too many corners in my mind
so much to do to set my heart right

Oh its taking to long
i could be wrong
i could be ready
Oh but if I take my heart's advice
I should assume, it's still unsteady
I am in repair

Another You

I'm gonna sing my way away from blue
I'm gonna find another you

When I was your lover
No one else would do
If I'm forced to find another
I hope she looks like you
and shes nicer too

Since I love this song so much, I'll post its entirety.
The Heart of Life

I hate to see you cry
Lying there in that position
There's things you need to hear
so turn off your tears
and listen

Pain throws your heart to the ground
love turns the whole thing around
no it wont all go the way
it should
but I know the heart of life is good

You know it's nothin new
bad news never had good timing
then the circle of your friends
will defend the silver lining

Pain throws your heart to the ground
love turns the whole thing around
fear is a friend who is
misunderstood
but I know the heart of life is good
I know its good, i know its good
oh i know its good

oh i do i do i do

oh i know its good

rockin my soundtrack,
me.

bonus from his John Mayer Trio material:
Try! (aka the Ultra elBlacko&McWhiteyton soundtrack song)

Takes four days to get to like me
But two to wanna leave
But the part that really gets me
Are all the moments in between
Now I lie to get a little
And laugh at every little thing
She's high on information
But now I'm low on self-esteem

So I'm gonna try (try)
I'm gonna try (try)
Gonna try to be myself
Although myself will wonder why
I'm gonna try (try)
I'm gonna try (try)
Gonna try to be myself this time

I'm a hundred kinds of crazy
But I only wanna find
One sweet little angel
Who's gonna let me speak my mind
All I ever do these days
Is dumb my process down
She's making her decision
But now I'm losing all my ground

So I'm gonna try (try)

If my weekend was in a cock fight with your weekend it'd gouge your weekends eyes out with its claws and feast on its souls robot chicken style.

This past week(end) was awesome. I paid for it greatly with a 40 minute raging charlie horse at like 6am this morning that I can still feel ghosts of in my head, but the price you pay when you carry the burden of having so much fun.

So now young children we'll take a journey, to a time long ago in the ye olden days of thursday. Rachems had finished her finals and so in the time true tradition of finalslochmasikuh (once a pagan holiday celebrating the grape harvest adapated by the Jews as a celebration of the mechanical pencil that had one cm piece left but miracilously lasted through the entire MCATs for the King Jacob... really just a boy from the bronx with a grandiose '80s hiphop alter-ego, and also adopted by the Church as Jesus' passing his water walking exam) we ventured forth to drink. What better place to celebrate such a solemn holiday than the Old Monk. Not only does the awesome miss jenn work there, always a plus, but they have great beer and liquor, awesome patios, and assuming the weathers nice (thus enabling the patio function) not too crowded. Being on knox it also misses the bulk of the stripeyshirtguy (© theJenn LLC) collective of uptown. Kristen, et al. also joined us, and it was good to see James and Lilian. Now, this is the point that if you're under 17 you best lock your door so your parents don't catch you..... err, I mean stop reading. I have a confession, I want to have sweet sexy raunchy sex with Chocalate Truffles. MMmmmmm trufflesex. Wha? You know not of the sexufied Truffles? My dear lads and lasses, the Chocolate Truffles sexyness is unparalleled, it would literally destroy our silly little planet (if sherman -williams doesn't do it first... more on that to come) were it not kept in balance by the Magic of Speedballs. The Chocolate Truffle is no other than Young's Double Chocolate Stout, mixed with Lindemans Framboise Lambic. And get this, it tastes like chocolate rasberry truffles! Oh but wait, its dark and to the untrained eye that can't detect the faint purple tint it looks like your drinking a guiness! That's right on the outside you can look like a maucho stout drinking badass, while on the inside your soul gets to skip like a lilly school girl through fields of metaphorical daisies while singing your favoritest musicals. Once Jenn was cut, a smaller cadre of us hit up the Dubliner for a last round of drinks. Like the Old Monk misses a bulk of the uptown crowd, the Dubliner's location misses a nice bit of the greenville crowd, and made for a chill night cap of scotch and drunk irish guys singing songs.

Friday was fairly uneventful, hung out with the rents, took a few naps, and then visisted rachel at the addison humperdinks. The End.

Saturday began with pizza at Fireside Pies. To be truthful saturday began weeks ealier somewhere in the atlantic that brought such stellar gorgeous weather. Riding down to knox, with the sunroof open, and listening to Prairie Home Companion there's only one word for it: Shibby. Even trying to find a parkingspot couldn't bring me down. I did find a spot eventually, in the sherman-williams parking lot. Put aside your davinci code, forget about your illuminati conspiracies, I've got the real deal: Sherman-williams is trying to take over the world.
Exhibit A)

Exhibit B) Do I really need an exhibit B? Look at it! They want to cover the earth with their red red 'paint'. Quickly! Fetch your foil hats, its your only chance. Check my blog for updates to this conspiracy (or I'll just get lazy like I did with the whole duck car conspiracy.... besides ignorance is bliss). After a brief interlude, I met up with rachems and jenn at the Gingerman where we had a beer out back. We then stopped by the Idle and had some carbombs with Stevie since she was bartending. After that we took off to the Slip Inn. I drove by myself and was running a bit behind rachel and jenn, as I walked to the door I did my patented pocket pat (teehee gogogadget consonance) and my heart sunk. fat square (wallet), little square (razr), multisquare(camera), pokies... pokes? where are the keys? And with that I realized I had just locked my keys in the car. In my frustration with Slip Inn parking I had left my keys on the seat, after talking shit about parking earlier not getting me down it had taken its bloody revenge when I had my back turned. After falling to my knees and shaking my fists in rage at the sky screaming "damn you parking" I set out to find a locksmith. Locksmithing is a curious buisness. I took me about 13 calls before I found a reputable sounding locksmith, one of my favorites was about call seven when a gruff voice answered the phone and I asked, "is this the locksmith?" and he answered, "depends" at which point I figured it best I hang up. So I ordered via text message a double scotch on the rocks while I waited, which rachel evidently got for free because of how hot it was a girl ordering a double scotch on the rocks. It was just like the beer commmercial! So the guys come, open my door in like 30 seconds (I need me some disreputable skills) and I had my keys back. I wasn't sure if rachel had gotten my scotch so I went ahead and ordered a double as I passed the bar, then made my way to the back to find Rachel and Jenn. As I settled into the booth, double fisting doubles of scotch, one free by way of hotness, in a dark club with a great DJ, sitting with two beautiful ladies a small grin crept upon my face as I thought, "Your powers are no match for my own, you will never beat me Parking, never."

Sushday, as I've renamed Sundays due to the awesome special on Sushi at Cafe Japon was the cap of a great weekend. I went to sushi with kristen, steve, nadia and ElBlacko. Sushi was good and cheap per the norm. Afterwards McWhiteyton(me), ElBlacko and the Todd headed to the gypsy for an incredible concert. Joined by mark, the opening act played. Usually I'd make a pro or negative comment about the opening act, but honestly energy must be put into the Martin portion, so he was Trevor Hall, chech him out.
Martin Sexton was fooking sweet. It was great that he was back over in the Tea Room instead of in the bloody Ballroom. Not only does the Tea Room have way less random drunk jackasses, its small venue allows for a more intimate with a direct connection with the audience. Also since he was headlining, he had a much longer set and more freedom in his songs. The concert was truly incredible, possibly due to having family present he played more at ease and open than at the last concert. Like always his infinitibillion octives, voice-replicated instrumentals, call-and-repeat with the audience, and incredible guitar skills floored me. If I had to come up with one word to describe the performance it'd have to be soulfolkincarnate. If I were a wordsmith I might be able to really capture the pefromance... but I'm not, I'm a nerd... so I captured it digitally!

Don't want you to pull a muscle having a songasm, so we'll warm up with some pictures...





The Things You Do to Me...


In the Journey...


Rock on.

using the lightside of the Force to trump Emperor Parkingtine since 1997,
me.